A Lighter Shade of Grey
by SlytherinDoe
Summary: Sev is tired of his life without Lily Evans, and he decides to do something about it. What happens, neither one of them would have ever suspected...
1. Chapter 1

The sun was shining and the birds were singing over the lakes and lawns of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Basically everything that, to any average teenager with any knowledge of boring cliches, would make a day seem promising and warm was in that day. Students sat on the sun warmed grass and gossipped about their upcoming Summer breaks, a few hardcore members of the Quidditch teams were already starting to practice for the last games of the season, but most seemed to be taking advantage of the lazy day and weren't even bothering to study for their final exams.

However, one lone figure, garbed in black and with his hooked nose stuck in a particularly large volume of "The Potioneer's Guide to Rare Maladies" was studying furiously. His thin lips formed the words and his brow creased with concentration as he read, eyes flickering quickly over the pages with the haste of someone who had an exam in about five minutes. But Severus Snape was not concerned about any forgotten potions quiz. In fact, Severus Snape was always one to be over-prepared for his classes. He was particularly brilliant in Potions, though Slughorn seemed not to notice, which is why he had chosen that particular book to peruse over that morning. He had his reasons for being alone. He was always alone, and that suited him just fine.

_Or so I keep telling myself..._

It had been nine months, three weeks, and five days since "the Incident", as Severus Snape had begun calling it. The moment he had shouted that awful word at her, his entire world had come crashing down around him, leaving him with a dead and empty soul. He simply didn't care anymore and, for the first time in his life, despite all of his studying, his marks were slipping. He had lost all desire to join the Death Eaters, and he wanted to tell her. He had tried, but rejecting his apology at the portrait hole had only heightened his self-loathing and caused his now desolately lonely existance to become more evident to anyone and everyone around him. He hardly slept, or ate for that matter. The entire Summer he had haunted their old special spots, hoping she would come and talk with him. But she never did, and he was slowly wasting away in his grief. He would study for hours on end in an attempt to block out the painful memory, at least for a little while...

He sighed heavily and, for the thousandth time, his eyes swiveled towards a group of girls with red and yellow striped ties. Curvy and soft girls who had many young men's eyes on them at that moment, but he wasn't interested in just any of them. His dark chocolate eyes locked onto one. Her back was to him, which was a bit of a disappointment because he was unable to glimpse his favorite feature of hers, but he would not complain. It was very rarely he ever saw her so close. The girl's fiery red hair hung in slight soft curls about her shoulders, and he could just pick out the light smattering of freckles adorning her pale shoulders. But he forced himself to turn back to the words on the book in front of him, the familiar image being pushed away again. He had self control, and he used it. Not that he wanted to.

But he was plotting, he reminded himself. He was making plans and using all of his Slytherin cunning to try and come up with something, anything, that would give him an excuse to talk with her. And for the first time in his life, Severus had nothing to show for all his thinking. Everything he considered just ended up sounding stupid or lame, or he knew she would see through his ruse and reject him again...

His throat constricted at the thought but, just then, he stood. She had seperated from a group of her fellow Gryffindors, sitting down on a round grey rock, a thin charms thaory book in her hands. It was a perfect oppurtunity. Before he could think himself out of it, he slunk over to where she sat hunched over the book and whispered,

"Hey, Lily." She looked up and those beautiful green eyes hardened against him as she took a deep breath. He shivered slightly._ Merlin, she only usually used to look at Potter like that._ He almost ran for it right then.

"What do you want, Severus?" A few of the other Gryffindor girls looked over at the pair, watching Severus as if he would suddenly strike like the evil snake they just knew he was at their friend and already beginning to form a protective half-circle around her. Severus looked at his shoes, and shuffled awkwardly. He mumbled,

"Lily, I was hoping we could talk somewhere. You know, alone." He quirked his head to a large willow tree close by and held his breath. She just stared at him, her mouth slightly agape and he just knew she would reject him. He could see her trying to already, but to his utter relief and amazement, she simply nodded stiffly. He held a hand out to help her up, but she refused and gathered her things in her arms, standing up on her own terms.

_So stubborn!_ He shoved his hands in his robe pockets and walked steadily towards the impending tree, pushing back the stringy branches until he made his way to the trunk. He turned slowly towards her, avoiding her gaze.

His stomach churned with excitement as he looked at her, his mouth opening and closng wordlessly like a fish, all the practiced speeches and arguements stuck somewhere, that while he stared into her "I'm waiting" gaze, were not accessable. She crossed her arms, and looked at the ground.

"Severus, do you have something to say? Are you going to threaten me or something?"He shook his head hurriedly, the question stinging him.

"Lily. I was- I just wanted to tell you I'm not joining them." Her eyes widened a little at that, but she remained otherwise expressionless.

"Severus..." she sighed, shaking her head. "That still doesn't change what you said to me."

"I know, and I'm so sorry. I never meant to call you that awful word. I've never thought of you like that. You're brilliant, Lily. I just- I lashed out."

She chuckled humorlessly, her eyes going back to his. "I've seen you hanging around with them. How do I know you're not lying? Besides, I don't care what circumstances you were under, you still said that word. I would never call you a name like that. You -knew- that would hurt me."

He nodded, all the guilt he had been trying to staunch rushing over him, and he managed to croak out, "I'm sorry, Lily."

She moved towards him slowly and looked up into his eyes, her's beginning to fill even as she tried to hide it.

"You hurt me, Sev." she whispered. Ah, the beloved nickname. They were getting somewhere. Shyly he raised his arms as if he was going to embrace her, then decided against it and dropped them to his sides loosely.

"You hurt me as well, Lily." Suddenly, a flash of anger enveloped Severus as he looked at her widening eyes.

"Wha-?"

"You smiled. As he was bullying me, you smiled. How do you think it feels to have your only friend, your best friend, laugh right alongside your enemies? How do you think that made me feel, Lily?" His fists clenched as he felt all the anguish he had experienced when she had flashed that hint of a smile during "the Incident." Her eyes threatened to spill as she looked up at him. "Because despite what most of the students and staff of Hogwarts likes to believe I HAVE feelings! But who cares? Just Slytherin Death Eater Scum, right?"

"Sev, I didn't know. I didn't realize..." A tear rolled down her soft cheek and dripped silently on the grass. "You hurt me, too..." she repeated quietly, the harsh tone replaced by the softest of whispers. She moved closer, drawing her arms tentatively around him. He hid his surprise as he stood stiffly in her arms. Oh, how he wanted to hold her like she was holding him!

"I forgive you." He said softly. She buried her face in his chest and he could hear a muffled sob escape her lips. He relented, and drew his arms slowly around her, pulling her close to him.

"I-I'm so sorry." she stuttered.

"Will you forgive me, then?" He asked, trying to keep the hopeful undertone from reaching her ears, but she just nodded and Severus caught the tiny trickle of tears running down her freckled cheek.

"Of course I do. You're my best friend." He pulled slightly away and fought the urge to rub the tears away with his thumb.

"Lily, what's wrong? Please don't cry." She sniffed and looked down at her feet.

"I just... I missed you." came her admission in barely a whisper. Severus blinked. _What?_

You- you missed me? I thought you hated me. For what I said." She shook her head slightly.

"I was angry, Sev. I- I could never hate you." Perhaps it was his resolve, perhaps it was his subtelty, but something overrid his caution and caused him to reach down and lift her face to his. He shuddered at his own daring.

"And why is that?" She looked up at him, and he could see her searching for the right words. Could see the battling emotions in those beautiful emerald eyes.

"Because, Sev, you- I don't know what I'd do without you." Severus suppressed a gasp and swallowed thickly.

"I understand, Lils." She just bit her lip and looked away. "I'm so glad we're friends again."

"Yeah..." He watched her, knowing that she wasn't saying everything she wanted to, but too damned afraid of being rejected.

"Or...?" She blushed.

"Nothing." _Damn it._ Now she was uncomfortable.

"We are still friends, right?" She leaned more into him and he breathed in her flowery scent greedily, momentarily overwhelmed by her close proximity.

"Of course we are, Sev. -Best- friends. Why?"

"You're just acting different-, is all." She gripped him tightly and he could see the faint pink tinge on her cheeks betray her.

"I'm just glad to have you back." He smiled slightly.

"Glad to be back." He held her close and buried his face into her hair. He couldn't control himself, he had to say it. The one fact he had wished her to know for as long as he had known her. A feeling he had tried to ignore, to bury, to hide for so many years. And he was tired of it all. He took a shaky breath and whispered so softly, he was sure she would not hear him "I love you..." She immediately stiffened.

"You- you WHAT?" SHIT! SHE HAD HEARD! He panicked, searching his mind desperately for an escape route. Something that could cover what he had said, but nothing came to him...

"I- I..." He managed to get out, his eyes wide in his shock. "You heard me?"

She nodded slightly, biting her lip. "You said... You said you love me?" She looked up into his eyes and he could see the confusion in them. He could see she was trying hard to decide on two very different sides of her, and he knew what he had to do to help her. He leaned down, slowly, waiting for her to object, and when she did not he pressed his lips to hers kissing her gently. She stiffened slightly in his arms then, to his surprise, melted into him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as his mouth carressed hers, savored it. He closed his eyes, reveling in his luck. _Merlin!_ Lily Evans, the girl he had loved for half his life, was in his arms, and she was kissing him! Slowly, he pulled away, his teeth running along her bottom lip as she looked at him. Her expression was one he had never seen before. Her eyes danced, still a little confused, but they danced. She was happy!

"Sev..." she whispered as she refused to pull away, instead pushing herself closer to him. He held his breath. She was leaning up towards him, pushing her lips back to his. He eagerly moved back close to her when a rustling of branches caught his attention.

"Snape! What the bloody hell are you doing to her?" Severus turned slightly, just able to catch the wild curls and Gryffindor tie, the intruder's wand pointed directly at his chest.

Sirius Black.


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh Gosh! I'm so sorry everyone! I haven't written in ages but I hope you like this chapter. So much fun to come!**

**As always on this Fic, LovelyLilys deserves half the credit! She is truly brilliant.**

**As a side note~ Steph, I -will- turn you into a Snily shipper. I will!**

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><p>Severus' wand was out in seconds, his arm gently pushing Lily behind him as he glared menacingly at Sirius. Sirius smirked very slightly, a strange dark and dangerous look in his eyes as he clucked his tongue in disappointment, shaking his head.<p>

"Lily. What are you doing here with Snivellus?"

Lily blushed a deep red and hid a bit behind Severus' shoulder. Her voice was a little confused.

"N-nothing..."

Sirius laughed humorlessly.

"You were -snogging- Sniv, and you're dating James. You're going to break his poor heart, Evans!"

Lily swallowed, her eyes filling with tears, her voice very soft.

"N-no. I'm n-not. I-I love James." Severus looked back at her, his wand lowering.

"L-Lily...?" She shook her head, closing her eyes, tears streaming quietly down her freckled cheeks.

"Please, Sirius. Please don't tell him This was nothing. -Nothing-." Snape flinched, backing up slightly, his throat constricting. Sirius chuckled.

"Well, the truth comes out, doesn't it, Sniv? You must be an awful snog, drooled all over her I'll bet." Severus said nothing. He looked determinedly at the ground, feeling as if he'd simultaneously made about fifty horcruxes. Lily stepped out from behind Severus, her voice steady.

"Just go, Sirius. Tell James I'll be along soon. Please, don't tell him about this. Please."

Sirius sighed, pocketing his wand, a smug smirk on his lips from the power he was holding over her. "And what if I tell?" Lily choked, a sob rising from her throat.

"Please, Sirius."

Sirius groaned, then nodded slowly. "Fine. But this just means you have to tell him about this." Lily nodded, her shoulders slumped as Sirius left.

Severus didn't look at her. He just couldn't. Embarrassment and heartbreak hurting him far more than either his Father or the Marauders had ever hurt him. Lily sniffled, tears still dripping off her chin.

"S- Sev?" Severus said nothing. He slumped, defeated, to the ground, his face buried in his robes. Silent sobs shook him as he shook his head in denial at what had just happened. Lily got on her knee's, crawled to him and wrapped her arms around him. Her voice was very shaky.

"Sev, please. Please talk to me." She kissed his cheek and tried to nuzzle her lips closer to his. "I'm sorry."

Severus leaned away from her, for once in his life feeling hurt by her mere presence. "Sorry for what, Lily?"

She rubbed his back, her voice soft. "Love, I just wanted him to leave us alone." He looked up at her, his eyes wide at the use of "Love" in the place of her usual "Sev." Lily gave him a slight smile, leaning her forehead gently against his. "Sev, of course I love you. I guess I just haven't realized it until now." Severus blinked, at a loss for words. Lily wiped her eyes and giggled. "Well, what are you waiting for? I believe you were in the middle of kissing me?"

It could've been painful, the way he pushed her hungrily to the ground as his lips enveloped hers, but the grass was soft enough to keep her comfortable. He leaned far over her, his hands in her hair, already murmuring apologies and words of relief to her. She shut him up with another deep kiss, his skin tingled at the sensation, as his head swam with joy.

_So this is what everyone is going on about._

Love was painful. Severus knew for a fact that it was. But apparently that was only true when you were alone in love. When you could actually hold the one you love it was incredible, beautiful. He could hardly contain his love and couldn't even think about hiding it anymore. This was him. This was Severus Snape at his most vulnerable.

She pushed him off after a few minutes, her eyes bright and a wide smile on her rather pink lips were a bit swollen as she caught her breath. The sight of them just made Severus want to kiss her more, but she held him off with a gentle hand pressed on his chest.

"I love you Severus Snape. I love -you-." He smiled slightly, her scent overwelming him, wanting to lean back down and kiss her once more desperately.

"I love you more than anything on this Earth. I have for a very long time." She smiled, tears of joy flowing from her eyes as her hand moved to his cheek.

"Y-you have?" He nodded, leaning down to kiss her tears away. She giggled softly and allowed him to do it, taking the oppurtunity to whisper in his ear.

"Then come with me. I want you all to myself tonight." He looked at her for a moment, not having understood exactly what she meant.

"But we have to go to our dorms." Lily smirked slightly, shaking her head.

"Severus. Think about it." He did, and after a moment his muscles tensed and his eyes widened.

"Lily... You don't mean...?" She merely nodded. "You want to-... With me?" She nodded again and bit her lip, which Severus found to be completely endearing.

"Don't you want to?" He swallowed then took a deep breath. He had always been teased in school, but once it had gotten around the Slytherin dorms that Snape had never gotten laid, he had never heard the end of it. Thank Merlin they hadn't found the real reason he had never been with a woman. They had chalked it up to the completely obvious reasons. His crooked, hooked nose. How scrawny he was. His gangly awkwardness. But what they didn't know was that, even if he was asked, he would never go to bed with anyone but the redhead who was asking him this very moment. He didn't -want- anyone else. He loved her with all his heart, and she was the only woman he had ever truly desired in that way.

"Yes. Of course, Love." She smiled and wiggled out from under him, pulling him up with her. She hugged him and giggled, her voice teasing.

"Seems someone's a bit eager..." He felt a hand circle his groin, and he realized that he was already extremely aroused, his member pulsating needily, and he groaned.

_How'd she get to be so naughty? Who would've thought the Gryffindore Prefect who gets impeccable grades and is every Professor's favorite student could be so -naughty-._

"Merlin, Lily. Do you have a place to go?" She nodded, a mischievious smile on her lips.

"I know just the place."


	3. Chapter 3

**HELLO EVERYONE! Alright, well, I've worked all weekend on this and I hope you like it. Some of the actual dialogue from mine and LovelyLilys RP had to be changed because I can no longer find those tweets. It was simply too long ago. **

**Anyways, I hope this isn't too bad. Admittedly this was my first truly smutty chapter. I love feedback so please review!**

**Love you all Always~ Snape's Lily**

**PS: At each line break, it switches from Sev to Lily's perspective or vice versa. Perspective starts out as Lily. :)**

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><p>Lily tugged Sev along at a hurried pace, not looking back at him. She could hear his quiet footsteps hurrying along obediently behind her, feel his warm breath on the nape of her neck, and she could almost see the utterly confused expression he had been wearing since they had left the safety of that tree. Lily was being careful to not be seen with him. She didn't want questions asked at the moment. She had some making up to do with Sev. She wore a small smirk on her lips, and her cheeks were flushed.<p>

She stopped him when they had reached the end of the seventh floor corridor, and deftly walked back and forth in front of it. Sev stood, his eyebrows raised, but he said nothing. After she had walked beside it three times, a large door appeared and Lily took Sev's hand again, as she pulled him inside.

"Lily, wha-?"

"Shh!" she hissed impatiently, and that shut him up. She hoped it would last. She was nervous enough.

A soft fire glowed in the small, cozy room, a large canopied bed in a corner. The floors were a smooth wood, with warm rugs set before the fire. The bed looked extremely pleasant. It was draped in a soft red, fluffy comforter and had about a hundred pillows of all shapes and sizes piled against the headboard. Candles were what kept the room lit in a low, romantic way, but Lily was still feeling a little sick to her stomach.

She chanced a glance at Sev. His eyes were wide but the arousal she had felt earlier was gone. That wasn't surprising to her. James often lost his just before, but she knew how to quickly get it back. She supposed it was too much excitement or something. How the hell should she know?

He held onto her hand gently, and his jaw was just a little slack. She could tell that his mind hadn't quite caught up with what was happening. He looked at her, speaking softly,

"Lily... What is this place?"

"Room of Requirement," she mumbled, taking her cloak off and setting her books against the wall. He nodded as if he understood, his eyes exploring the room.

"Amazing. I'd heard some of the seventh years speaking of it. Said they brought girls here to-..." He blushed, and looked down. She found his embarrassment endearing. He swallowed audibly and looked up at her. "Don't you want to, I don't know, date first? Why this so fast? Not that I'm complaining." He added hurriedly.

Lily cocked her head a little to the side, like she always did when she was confused. Sev used to tease her when she did it. He'd smirk and tell her she looked like a puppy begging for something.

"I'm confused. Sev, don't you love me?" He nodded, his eyes wide with nothing but the most pure sincerity. Her breath hitched a little. "Well, I love you, and I want to make it up to you for ignoring you these past couple months. I want to -prove- that I love you, Sev." He sighed, and shook his head.

"Lily, you dont have to do that." She looked at him curiously a moment.

_He doesn't mean that._

He took her hands in his, and she was surprised at the softness of them. He murmured. "I don't need that. All I need is you."

She cocked her head a little furthur to the side and she was surprised to hear him chuckle softly at her expression. "B-but I need to prove to you that I love you." Sev shook his head again, and leaned over to kiss her in the most tender way she had ever felt before.

_James never kisses me like this.._

She was quickly becoming lost in the softness of his lips, but he murmured gently into her mouth, distracting her. "Why would you think you need to prove it? I trust you, love." Her breath hitched a little. When she had started to date James he was a gentleman. He held her hand, was sweet, kissed her in public... But it wasn't long before he started asking. He would pout when she told him no.

_Apparently no one ever said "no" to James fucking Potter._

So, one night, he spiked her drink with something. Because that was the only way the genius could get Ms Stubborn into bed. So, she went and gave her first time to him willingly. She had meant, as every nice girl did, to wait for her husband, but now that that was out the window she didn't care. James began to only be sweet when she was making love to him. He only told her he loved her when he was trying to seduce her again. After a while, she realized, she began to think that was love. That sex was how to get love.

He looked directly into her eyes, whispering. "Have you and James ever...?", and a deep blush crept up his neck and settled into his cheeks. She bit her lip, cursing the way he was always able to guess what she was thinking. She noticed as his gaze settled on the bitten lip, could see the longing in his eyes for it.

"Yes..." His eyes widened a bit and he pulled away slightly.

"Oh." She nodded and looked down, a little ashamed.

"Have you...?" He looked at her and shook his head slowly, his voice soft. Something did a little happy leap in her, and she didn't understand why.

"It was either you or no-one." She looked at him a moment, then quietly led him to the bed, sitting down and tugging his arm down. He sits beside her, his hands in his lap. He wrung his hands in what she supposed was nervousness.

"If this is too wierd, I understand." He shook his head again and took her hand, tugging her back down to sit on the bed.

"No- No. I'll get over it." He gave her a small smile and she whispered sullenly, toying with a loose thread on the comforter.

"It's not like it was just-..." she blushed deeply. "I loved him."

_Did I? Really?_

Sev sighed, something flickering in his eyes, and he watched her a moment, "I know. I forgive you." And that was when she realized that she really wanted him. Not just to make it all up to him, or to prove her love. She simply wanted him. -Needed- him, if she was honest with herself.

She scooted a little closer, a gentle hand coaxing his lips toward hers. "I love you, Severus Snape."

He smiled and his lips brushed her as he whispered back,"I love you too, Lily Evans."

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><p>Severus was in a state of panic.<p>

_Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god!_

She was pulling him down, laying herself underneath him. How many times had he imagined this moment?

_And goddamnit all! I have no fucking clue what I'm doing!_

She was such an angel. She was coaxing him along, kissing him deeper and deeper until he could hardly breath. Her tongue caressed his, her taste threatening to overwhelm him. She took his hands in hers gently and placed them over the buttons of her blouse, where they began to shakily unbutton...

_And I'm looking at Lily Evans' breasts... Merlin._

He brushed the shirt off of her shoulders, his eyes widening as they fell on the soft pale skin. Her plump, perfect breasts settling against the white cotton bra. She was so completely innocent. Untouched. Or, at least untouched by him. His lips became distracted from kissing hers and they instincively began a trail across her jaw, behind her ear, and down her neck. He could feel her pulse flutter as his lips brushed over her neck, and she whimpered a bit as he nipped experimentally at the soft skin.

Every movement, every little wriggle or whimper was catalogued. He memorized reactions to where he placed his lips, where his teeth nipped at her skin. He peppered the pale flesh with tiny red marks that said "She is -mine-."

_Does she like her collarbone kissed?_

A smile and her hands wrapped themselves in his hair. _So, yes._

_What about her neck?_

His lips brushed over the goosebumped skin on her neck and before he could even kiss her, he felt her body wriggle beneath him and she whimpered again. _So, a definite yes. _

As his lips settled furthur down he wished he knew how to take the damned bra off. His fingers fumbled as they reached behind her and felt for the little clasp and she arched her back to help him get it off. With a small click, the bra became undone and she sighed with relief as her breasts were freed. He sat up a bit, and she giggled at his awe-struck expression, her hands wrappinng behind his neck as she whispered.

"You can kiss them too, Love." His hands ran over the inside of her neck as his lips enveloped a small pink nipple immediately, and she let out a little moan. Pride swelled in him as he realized she liked what he was doing. His fingers skittered over the goose bump covered skin, and she shivered a little as they dipped into the small hollow of her collarbone. He was memorizing everything about her, every little sound, every touch, every carress. He would never forget this.

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><p>"Oh my-... Oh Merlin, Sev!" Lily gasped as she felt his tongue run over her hardened nipples. She could tell he was learning. Studying her just as he did potions. She loved how reverently he touched her, how hesitantly he ran his fingers over her breasts as if he would offend her. She loved it all. She never knew him to be so gentle, so unbelievably polite and eager to ran his hands down his clothed chest and she suddenly wanted to feel her skin against his. She tugged upwards at his shirt and he lifted his lips off of her just long enough to allow it to be pulled off over his head.<p>

Lily gave a little gasp as she saw his bare torso. He was skinny, much too skinny, and pale. Every muscle was visible under the skin, and it made him look attractive in an odd sort of way. His ribs stuck out just far enough that she could count each of them. But his build is not what shocked her.

Everywhere. Bruises, scars, half healed scabs. Her fingertips reached out and traced one that ran from the base of his neck all the way to his navel. She could feel him shiver against her touch. She was so horror struck, it took a soft whisper to make her realize he was watching her.

"Is it alright, Love?" She looked up at him and tears filled her eyes.

"Sev..." she whimpered, one hand pressed gently on his chest. He kissed her cheek, his voice tender, using that soft, reassuring tone of his when she was sick or sad. It soothed her.

"Lily, my father..." he leaned down and kissed her gently, his lips catching hers lovingly. "You knew already. I'm alright."

She had known his father beat him. Merlin, every morning during the summer he would be either bruised or bloody or both. Sometimes, he allowed her to help him, but he was very proud and she had to make it look as if she were just trying to make him look presentable.

_*a memory*_

_'Sev, you really shouldn't let yourself leave the house with all that blood on your face.'_

_'Doesn't matter. What do you care?' he'd snap. She'd shrug, she was used to his anger. She knew he was just embarrassed._

_'I just think the blood makes you look a bit frightening, Slytherin.' A small smile._

_'Maybe I want to look frightening.' She would roll her eyes. Pull out her handkerchief._

_'Just come here, you.' He'd glare at her a moment as she dipped the cloth into the river, then he'd sigh heavily and scoot a little closer. He'd sit very still as she cleaned him up, telling her that he could do it just as well. But she never let him. She -liked- being the one to take care of him._

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><p>He was still watching her as she looked back up into his eyes. He knew he was disgusting.<p>

_Why would a girl like Lily Evans want to fuck someone like me?_

The look in those wonderfully emerald eyes pained him. He could see the tears forming, could tell she was deeply upset. So he leaned close and whispered.

"I can put my shirt back on, if you like. Or-... Or we can stop." Please let her not want to stop.

But she just shook her head, blinking back the tears, pushing back the sadness. He kissed her gently, just to remind her that he was alright.

"Please, keep going." She murmured. Her hands slid down his chest, landing on the hem of his trousers. They toyed with the button.

_Merlin, I must control myself!_

He began kissing her again, his mouth working slow and warm against hers. Tasting her, allowing her to explore his cheeks and exploring hers in turn. She tasted of peppermint gum. His fingers edged down towards her skirt, finding the side zipper and tugging it down. She did not protest but he could feel her heartbeat quickening. She already had his button and zipper undone, she was shakily pushing his trousers down, past his thighs. He kicked them off. He had only his boxers on, and he was beyond frightened of her seeing what was growing under those.

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><p>She could tell he was nervous. This was his first time, wasn't it. She could hardly blame him. It had not been James' first time when it had been her's. He had reassured her, and he had been gentle. Or as gentle as he could be. Compared to Sev, he was rough. She marveled at Sev's tender touch, how he only allowed his fingers to brush over her skin. He did not grab, or pinch, or poke as James sometimes did. He treated her like she was something precious.<p>

He drew the skirt off of her, and she could almost hear him as he swallowed. His eyes widened once more. She giggled. It was surprising how natural this all felt. It wasn't awkward at all.

"Why are you laughing?" he looked at her, a little fear in his eyes and she bit her lip, sorry that she had laughed.

"You're just so-... cute, when your eyes go all wide." He blushed deeply, hooking a shaky finger under her white, lacy underwear. Her hands ran down his back, slid into his boxers and with one little tug, they were down. Her eyes widened and her mouth formed a little "o" as she saw him.

"Wh-what's wrong with it?" she heard him stutter, his eyes flickering from his erection to her expression, his eyes widening once more. She stifled her giggle this time, looking up at him and stroking his hair.

_He's -huge-! James has reason to be jealous._

"Nothing, Sev. It's a... pleasant surprise." He raised an eyebrow, then smiled a little and kissed her neck softly. She gave him a soft moan as she felt his arousal against her stomach, and he murmured lustily in her ear.

"Your turn." and he slipped her underwear down, untangling them from her legs and tossing them onto the floor. He let out a little groan, then blushed and stopped the noise. She just smiled and moaned softly, encouraging him, pulling his head down to kiss her, fingers all tangled up in his hair. His hands were gliding over her hips, feeling the softness of her thighs, touching everywhere except the one place she longed for the most. Damn it she couldn't take this foreplay any longer, so with one flash of Gryffindor boldness she grabbed him. He gasped and stopped his kissing, and she whispered into his ear hoarsley,

"Need you, now." He gave her a slight nod, and he lined himself up with her entrance. He looked directly into her eyes, his arousal brushing the skin of her inner thighs. She whimpered and spread her legs a little wider.

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><p>"I love you, Lily Evans." And as he said it, he slid into her smoothly, and he let out the breath he was holding.<p>

And with that small motion, all of the nervousness disappeared, and suddenly it was the most natural thing in the world to be doing this with Lily. Lily, his best friend. And as he began to move deep and slow inside of her, and she let out small whimpers and little moans, he was overcome with his love for her. Suddenly, it didn't even matter how fucking wonderful being inside her felt to him. It only mattered that with each stroke her mouth would open a little, and a little rush of peppermint scented breath would escape. It only mattered that when he began to kiss her neck again, she would moan louder. It only mattered that with every movement, she would whisper his name like a song. Over and over again.

"Sev, Sev, Sev, Sev. Sev!" And then he knew he had discovered something because her eyes were wide and she was gasping as he moved a little faster. Her body trembled as he must've found some secret spot within her that made her feel good. And he was proud.

_Damn it. She's so beautiful, a-and wet..._

He felt something welling up inside him, and his heart beat faster as if in preperation for it. The pleasure was so intense he thought he would never want to stop. Her fingernails dug deeply into his skin, but he couldn't feel them. She curled up to him a little, her hips meeting his, and it was harmony. Perfectly balanced as they were united.

"Sev, Sev. I'm close. Close, Sev..." He knew what that meant and for once he thanked his Slytherin housemates, because if he had learned anything from their vulgar stories it was that when a girl tells you that, you move faster!

So he did. He moved faster, deeper, -harder- into her. Not trying to hurt her, still keeping his movements smooth. And she let out a high pitched whimper and bit her lip hard, then all of a sudden, she tensed up, crying out. That scared him for a moment, but when she settled back against the pillows, smiling and still saying his name he knew what had happened. And besides, he felt something welling up in him, and- and...

"L- L- Lily!" and he released himself into her, and it was the most wonderful, the most amazing feeling he had ever experienced. He shook a little as the waves of ecstacy rolled through him, wanting nothing more but to lay down and immediately pass out. But he forced himself to gently withdraw from her, laying down and panting beside her. She looked over at him and giggled, but this time he didn't care. He felt her take his hand and he smiled, a genuine smile, looking over at her in amazement.

"Wow." That was all he could say. There were no other words. She cuddled up next to him, and he was astonished at how well their bodies molded together. His sharp and angular, hers soft and curvy. She rested her head in the crook of his neck and shivered slightly.

His mind kicked into gear. He pulled her to him with one arm, the other knocking away the multitude of pillows, pulling back the covers and sliding her down into them. He slithered in beside her and she resumed snuggling him. He heard her sigh, and her warm breath against his neck made him smile. He kissed her cheek tenderly.

"Thank you, Love." she smiled softly, wrapping her arms around him.

"No, thank -you-. That was-... wonderful. You're great." He blushed, and his arms snaked around hers, his fingers toying with her hair. Her legs tangled with his and he pulled the covers up to their chins, replaying what had just occured over and over in his mind. Memorizing it. Locking it safely away. She sighed softly, her eyes closed and he kissed her again. Their heartbeats melding together until it they felt as one.

"Oh, Sev..."

"Lily..."

Something dripped onto his thigh, and for a moment he wondered what it was. Warm and sticky, then he remembered and he smiled to himself. After a few seconds, his eyes snapped open.

_SHIT! _


	4. Chapter 4

She sat up with him, but her movement was less urgent. She looked exhausted and her body leaned against his a little. Severus' eyes were wide, and he groaned.

"Lily, please tell me you did the contraceptive spell." Her eyes widened and she shook her head, fear in her eyes.

"N-no. James always did it. You did, didn't you?" He buried his face in his hands and groaned again, shaking his head and Lily began to tremble.

"Sev! B-but, what if- if-..."

"You're pregnant?" She nodded, tears sliding down her cheeks. That made him snap out of it. As soon as he looked up and saw the absolute terror in her eyes, he remembered what he was supposed to do. He drew his arms around her protectively and whispered.

"What if you are?" he kissed the top of her head, hating how she shook in his arms.

"The-then I'll be pregnant out of wedlock, my parents will kill me- and you -and I'll have to be a single Mum, and- and-...!" she gasped for air and his stomach knotted with worry. Her hands gripped his sides, and her tears felt cool against his skin.

"What makes you assume that?" he purred soothingly in her ear despite how scared he was. "Lily, if you're pregnant, I'll be here. But think about it, love. This was only one time. You probably won't be."

She looked up at him, her eyes incredulous. "You'd really stay with me?" he nodded, his lips brushing her cheek.

"Of course..." She nodded slowly, her eyes locked on his and he gently laid her back down, kissing her softly. She sniffled and cuddled as close to him as she possibly could, whispering against his chest

"I'm so scared." He stroked her hair softly as he nodded, ignoring his own fear for a moment to reassure her.

"Me too, but we'll be ok." She nodded, then slowly pulled away, her eyes trailing down to her own very flat tummy, and she placed a shaky hand over it. The small action made Severus stop for a moment, and he sucked in a breath.

"Lily...?" She looked up at him, and immediately removed her hand, looking embarrassed. Severus shook his head and took her hand, replacing it where she had it, his own hand covering hers.

"Lily, do you want to know a secret?" His heart thumped wildly in his chest. He had never voiced what he was about to tell her. She simply nodded, the innocent look in her eyes making him want to protect her from the world, but he just smiled and whispered

"When I was very little and we had just met, well... You know I don't have a family. Not one that I like anyways. So, every time I'd be bloody and bruised, unable to sleep from all the yelling, I'd make believe I had a lovely family." He kissed her cheek. "One where I was loved, wanted, and-... You were always the Mummy and I was the Daddy." He blushed, but she just stared up at him, and after a few minutes she murmured

"You imagined me and you as a family?" He swallowed, and nodded once.

"Uh-huh. And later, when I was a bit older, I promised myself that I'd be the Father mine never was for me. I wouldn't beat my family like my father does. That's when my imaginary family grew, and suddenly there was a baby. And I proved to myself that I could be a good Dad." Her eyes widened, and a small smile flickered at the corner of her lips, which surprised Severus. "Well, at least to myself." Shouldn't she be terrified? Or yelling at him for being so stupid as to maybe have knocked her up?

"Was the baby a boy or a girl?" He raised an eyebrow, her reaction not having been what he expected.

"A- a little girl." She smiled widely at that and giggled.

"Really?" He nodded slowly and she giggled again. "And did this little girl have a name?"

He swallowed, frowning a bit. She did indeed have a name. The mention of that name brought back such horrendous memories it made him want to sob, but he closed those feelings off and gave her a weak smile. The name was entirely the reason he actually wanted children.

"Yes. Iris." She chewed on her bottom lip for a moment before she smiled approvingly and whispered

"Iris... I like that, Sev." He let out a breath, relieved she didn't ask why he had chosen that particular name.

"Thanks, but remember, you're probably not even pregnant. I'll brew the potion in the morning just to check, though." She nodded, the happy glint in her eyes gone, and she nuzzled into his neck.

"Okay. Promise you'll stay with me?"

"Promise."

And as he held her, and she eventually drifted off to sleep, he though a lot about that little imaginary family and he wondered if it was really imaginary anymore.

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><p><strong>Reviews are greatly appreciated!<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello everyone! Here's the next piece of the story! **

**Love~ Snape's Lily**

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><p>There wasn't any sleep to be had for poor Severus that night. Lily cuddled close to him, her lips pressed against the skin of his neck, and every so often she would whisper something indistinguishable. He stared up at the ceiling, his eyes a bit wide and very thoughtful. His stomach churned and he felt like he wanted to throw up. What if Lily was pregnant? She'd -hate- him for doing that to her. He hadn't meant to of course, he had been stupid. How could he have forgotten the fucking spell?!<p>

_What if she leaves?_

_The baby. If she was pregnant, what would happen to the baby?_

_Her baby. No, -our- baby. I could be a Daddy._

He swallowed and began to break out in a cold sweat. He wasn't worried about his parents. His father didn't care about him anyways, and if Lily was pregnant he doubted his Mum would ever find out. He wouldn't allow Lily or their baby anywhere near his old home. He'd have to get a job. Buy a house.

_It won't matter if she leaves you, idiot._

_If she is pregnant surely she'll stay, yeah? Even if she doesn't he'd help her in any way she'd allow._

_What if she kills it?_

_No, she wouldn't do that. That's just so un-Lily there was no way she'd do that. But still, he worried about it._

_What if she gives it away?_

_No._

But that seemed more plausible. It really wasn't his choice, was it? She was carrying the child. But yeah, it should be partly his choice! He wasn't kidding when he said he wanted kids. He could be a good Dad! There was so much more to him than his cold exterior.

_And I want my baby._

It wasn't so much a thought. Just more of a need. This was his baby! Damnit, no one else would lay a hand on it. This child wasn't all Lily's. Just because she carried it didn't change the fact that it was half Lily Evans and half Severus Snape. It was half it's Daddy too.

Or was it? What if it's James? You don't know it's yours. She said she'd been with him too. Actually, it would be more realistic for it to be James. Maybe Potter had forgotten the spell once too. After all, she'd been with Potter more times than him. And wasn't it highly unlikely that she'd be pregnant with his child the first go around?

_She may not even be pregnant._

_But what if she is?_

_Do I want a baby?_

_Yes._

_Can I afford a baby?_

_... No._

_Can I care for a baby?_

_I can learn._

_Can I keep a Quarter blood baby safe during a war?_

_I'd give my life for Lily. Of course I'd do the same for my baby._

He took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. He could do this. He'd get a job, quite school if he had to. He'd accept any bloody job he could get. He'd work in a resteraunt if he had to. He'd do anything for Lily. Anything to be given the privelage to hold her in his arms. To kiss her whenever he wanted. To make love to her...

"Sev...?" He started slightly at her whisper. The slight noise had frightened him for a moment, but he quickly regained his composure and nuzzled her cheek with his lips.

"Good morning, my sweet sweet Lily." he whispered. She smiled slightly and yawned, then snuggled even closer to him.

"You're so warm, Sev."

"Mm... So are you."

"But it's like... You're hot."

"Thanks, I guess." he chuckled. It was easy to slip into their playful banter and forget the cloud of dread hanging over them.

"You know what I mean, jerk." She smirked softly, her eyes lightly shut. "It's a bit chilly in this room." She shivered slightly and his arms tightened around her.

"I can light a fire for us. There's a hearth." But she shook her head and frowned.

"No... Don't leave me." she whispered pathetically. Then her eyes looked up into his and he saw the growing fear in them. He had to be brave for her.

"I promise, I won't." he murmured gently. They laid quietly for a while. Each not wanting to continue the day, knowing what could happen if they did. But suddenly, Severus couldn't wait any longer. The suspense was killing him. "Love...? Should I brew that potion now?" She sniffled, her fingers gripping his sides, and she slowly nodded.

"Okay..." He nodded and slowly untangled himself from her, and he shivered a bit as he got out of bed. The room -was- chilly. He pulled on his discarded trousers and scratched the back of his neck. His muscles protested against him. They werent happy to be moving about so early in the morning.

"I'll be right back, Lils." he said softly. "It won't take long to brew-..." But he shook his head, hardly believing his eyes. In the middle of the room, a small table stood with a tiny flask on it.

_The fucking room knows we need a pregnancy test._

He gingerly picked the little flask up, uncorked it, and brought it under his nose. It smelled like citris, so it was definitely a pregnancy test. He held it up to the light then recorked it, walking back to the bedside where Lily watched him with curious eyes.

"What's that?" she whispered curiously.

"Pregnancy test potion. The Room provided it for us. That's useful, eh?" She nodded, then took the little flask in her hands and gripped it.

"I want to know now." His stomach did a flip, but he nodded calmly. He helped her up and out from under the covers, wrapping a blanket around her bare form. The sight of her naked body made him blush, and he felt himself grow warm and a little itchy, but he pushed those feelings back down and walked her to a small open door. A pearly toilet, shower, and sink could be seen in the little room and he stopped her just before she entered.

"All you have to do is drink it. It'll make you have to-... Well, go. Pink for pregnant and blue for not pregnant, ok?" She nodded, her expression oddly calm and a bit blank.

"Okay." He searched her eyes then placed a small kiss on her forehead.

"It'll be ok, Lily. I'll be here for you no matter what color it is." She simply nodded silently again, looking a bit detatched and she shakily uncorked the flask and held it to her lips. The liquid trembled as she lifted the bottom upwards, the substance slipping slickly down her throat. She didn't even grimace at the taste.

"I'll call when I'm done." And with that she turned and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. He flinched a bit as the door shut, and he leaned against it as he closed his eyes.

_Oh, Merlin._

It seemed like ages before he heard her soft whisper, and he slowly stood and faced the door. His hand rested shakily on the knob and he swallowed again before cracking it open a bit. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he tried to relax himself.

That's when he heard the sob.

The door was immediately open and there was his Lily, looking so little and frightened all curled up on the floor. He didn't even bother looking at the bowl. Instead, he hurried to wrap her up in his arms and she sobbed against his chest hard. He glanced back at the water, the very pink water, knowing that it was pink before he even saw it. He took a shaky breath before he pressed his lips to her neck.

"Lily, listen to me. I'm here. It's Sev. I'm here like I always have been and always will be. I promise, my darling. I swear to you that I'm not going anywhere. Hey..." He kissed her lips and tasted the salt of her tears, and she sobbed harder. She curled into herself, her eyes squeezed shut as if that would keep her safe. She was shaking her head, her skin pale and a bit green.

"Sev! I- I'm p-pregnant!" He nodded and kissed her again, so terribly frightened she'll leave him or hate him.

"Sh, love, I know. I'm so sorry." She shook her head again, burying her face in his chest.

"I-I'm only seventeen!" He nodded again.

"I know. I'm so so sorry." She hit his chest with the palm of her hand.

"Stop saying that! It's not helping!" she snapped. He nodded once again and he kissed her temple. He knew that she was scared.

"Okay. But I'm here. I'm not leaving. And guess what." He lifted her chin with a finger, his confidence growing now that he knew what he must do. "I get to be a Daddy. And we'll have a little bundle. A little bundle to call our very own. And you'll be a baby's Mummy. Think about that." She cried against his chest a little harder and he rocked her as she did, showing no other signs of anger or aggression towards him. She simply melted into his arms, allowing herself to be rocked and her back to be rubbed. And as she slowly calmed down, he leaned close to her ear.

"I love you." She let out a tiny sob, and tears leaked down her cheeks. She sniffled as she looked up at him, and her lips twitched into a weak smile as she hugged him close.

"I love you too." He smiled and his heart soared.

I am one lucky bastard.

"Are you excited, Sev?" she whispered, and her tiny voice became a bit stronger with each moment. "Maybe you'll actually have that little girl soon." He chuckled, and his lips covered her face in tiny kisses. She giggled half heartedly and he ended up kissing her lips very softly. When he finally pulled away, only a fraction of an inch, his eyes filled with a happy tenderness.

"I'm so very happy. I've got my family. I'll take care of us. I promise." She brought her hand up to his cheek and he could tell she was relaxing. Her Gryffindorian bravery gave her that edge, and he suddenly knew everything would be ok. She was so strong.

"I trust you, Sev."

And on that cool bathroom floor, with all of that frightening uncertainty ahead of them, he still found the happiness to smile. To push away those thoughts and worries for a moment.

So he could kiss her again.

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><p><strong>Reviews bring more chapters faster! :P<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello everyone! I hope you enjoy this chapter and a merry belated Christmas!**

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><p>This was insanity.<p>

"Sev, could-... could you rub my back?"

"Of course, love."

Insanity. Pure wonderful insanity.

His fingers ran ever so lightly up and down her back. Her body was pressed into his in the most delightful way, flat tummy against his waist, her little cool nose nuzzled into the crook of his neck. He heard her sigh in contentment as he rubbed her back. This had always been able to calm her before... Well, before what'd happened. His free hand wandered, and she allowed it to, down her side and over her waist, feeling the soft warmness of the skin, the gentle strength of her muscles. Memorizing her was easy, he must've done it twice already, but that didn't mean he couldn't indulge in his pregnant girlfriend's body just a little while longer.

Pregnant. Oh Merlin.

His fingers drifted, and finally they rested on the flat plane that was her tummy. He felt his heart pound. He was only seventeen for Godric's sake. Her father was going to kill him. He'd probably rip his penis off or something horrific in punishment for getting Lily pregnant. It's not like he had meant to do it! Severus scoffed to himself. Even he knew that was a lame excuse. No, he'd take whatever was coming to him. Whatever her father saw fit to do, he would accept it.

Beautiful terrifying insanity.

Lily's lips found his pulse point and he let out a shuddering breath All the worries of the world and their present situation seemed to melt away with that one little kiss. His arms tightened around her and he felt her smile against his skin.

"Why'd you stop?"

"Hm?"

"Rubbing my back... It felt so good." She tilted her head and looked at him, her eyes soft with what he knew was love. His fingers immediately restarted her massage and she moaned very quietly against him. He chuckled softly, enjoying the sound. He looked down at her and returned her smile.

"Are you hungry?" She shrugged, and he watched as she closed her eyes.

"A little." she mumbled. He pressed a few light kisses to her jaw. Merlin, if any of his housemates saw him like this, he'd never hear the end of it. He remembered a time when he tried to block out this part of him. Unfortunately, all of the softness, the gentle nature, the warm timid personality he had tried to hide behind cold unfeeling cruelty was strong. Stronger than he had realized. He wasn't a people person at all. In fact Lily was the only person he would willingly be around. It wasn't so much that he hated everyone else, he was just more coldly indifference. The Marauders he hated. Anyone who dared insult Lily in front of him, he hated. He hid his hatred well, however. Especially when it came to his housemates. He hated when they said nasty things about her, but he hid his anger inside his heart and tried to ignore them. He didn't know if he'd be able to hold himself back now. So much had changed.

"Lily?" She just grunted in response, apparently too tired for anything more. "I'm not going back to my dorm." Immediately he was staring into her beautiful emerald eyes. She propped herself up a little and looked down at him, the most adorable expression of shock and confusion crossing her expression.

"What?" she whispered quietly as she leaned over him slightly. He shrugged.

"I'm not staying in the Slytherin dormitories any longer." Her eyes widened and she looked at him for a long while, seemingly at a loss for words. Her fingers brushed a bit of stray hair that had fallen in front of his face behind his ear.

"I-I... But where will you sleep?" He shrugged again as if it didn't matter. It did, of course. He wanted desperately to sleep somewhere with her. The whole reason he wanted to do this was to protect her. He knew how his housemates thought of her and he didn't want to risk them testing out hexes on her and his child because he wasn't there to stop them. Many of them knew the Gryffindor's password...

"It's not doing you or our baby any good with me so close to the Dark Lord's followers and so far away from you. I don't want you alone for a moment." he whispered. He knew it sounded a bit clingy and jealous, then again when it came to Lily he was always clingy and jealous. Now that she was truly all his, he couldn't imagine anyone ever touching her, or even looking at her, but him. He knew it was greedy, but he couldn't help it. She was looking at him like he was going mad, one of her eyebrows arched in disbelief.

"Sev. I'll be fine. O-Our baby will be fine. No one will even notice I'm pregnant for a little while. Besides, I'm not weak. I can handle anything those dunderheads throw at me. You're just paranoid." He nodded slowly, knowing she was strong and skillful. She was taking the whole pregnancy situation surprisingly well. After she stopped crying initially she hadn't cried since. However, she clung to him as if he was her life support. He couldn't even go to the bathroom without having her trying to follow him in. He didn't let her, of course, it embarrassed him. Not her, though. She dragged a very bashful Sev into the bathroom with her whenever she went. They had gotten dressed, Severus transfigured their robes into pajamas, and they'd laid in bed all day. Just talking. That had given Severus the time to formulate what he was going to do about their future. First things first. Get out of Slytherin House.

"I'm going to ask Dumbledore if there's somewhere we can be."

Lily stared at him like he had just grown watermelons out of his ears, but she struggled to answer him, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

"D-Dumbledore?" she said quietly, "Do you really think he'll help us?"

"Maybe. We just need somewhere neutral. Not Gryffindor, not Slytherin. Away from everyone else. I mean, what happens when other girls get pregnant?"

He watched as Lily's eyes softened, and she leaned down to kiss him very softly. He smiled as he kissed her back, his voice hardly a whisper as she pulled back to look at him, "What was that for?"

"Because I'm sorry I never realized who I had all these years. Right under my nose. Sev." she pressed a brief kiss to his lips again, and giggled quietly. "If I was ever going to get pregnant, I'm glad you're the reason."

"Mmm.. Well, I'm glad you see it," he teased, "I love you, Lily." She smiled widely down at him.

"I love you too."

"But we need to figure out what we're going to do." He looked at her seriously and nodded, resting her chin on his chest. She was so damn cute.

"So Dumbledore? I don't know, Sev..."

"Just trust me. He loves you. He may help us." He leaned forward to kiss her forehead gently, and he heard her let out a sigh. He smiled as he saw her roll her eyes and smirk.

"Fine. I trust you."

"Good. Because you're having my baby. You sorta _have_ to trust me." She giggled and leaned forward to kiss his chin.

"I'll do what I want. Now, let's go get a bite for dinner. We can talk to Dumbledore after."

"You're the boss, Lily." She laughed in amusement and pushed his shoulder playfully.

"Glad you're finally figuring it out."

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><p><strong>Reviews make me happy! Love you all :)<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

Unfortunately for Severus, there was no "neutral" table in the Great Hall. As they walked to dinner, Lily's tummy rumbling hungrily, they discussed where they should sit. Severus, of course, wanted to sit somewhere with her, but the Marauder's would never allow him to sit at the Gryffindor table, and there was no way Severus would allow Lily to sit with the Slytherins. It would be suicide. Lily suggested sitting at either Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw's table but realized it would be beyond strange for them to do that and besides: they planned on keeping their baby's existence a secret. At least for a little while.

So they were going to sit at their usual tables, in their usual spots. Severus wasn't happy with the idea of Lily at such a close proximity to Potter. He turned his head, his eyes immediately finding Lily's soft auburn curls and scowled as he watched a mop top of black scraggly hair bouncing around her. He grumbled under his breath, jealousy sticking in his throat. Lily was _his_. Not Potter's. Couldn't the dunderhead take a hint?

"Oi, Snape! Who're you ogling at?" Severus turned back around and faced his housemates. Malfoy was looking down his pointed nose at Severus, his lips twisted into a smirk. "Well?"

"No one, Malfoy." He replied calmly. He pushed some chicken around his plate, his eyes dark. Malfoy wasn't finished, however, and he leaned across the table.

"Why're you still wearing the same clothes you were yesterday?" He scoffed and crossed his arms, and bit of bleach blonde hair fell in front of his eyes as he raised a suspicious eyebrow. It made his face look even more arrogant. If that was even possible. "Did you fuck a girl?!" At that, nearly everyone within hearing distance turned their gazes towards Severus. Nott laughed and shook his head.

"C'mon, Lucius. Who'd lay Snape?" Severus chewed on a piece of chicken thoughtfully, not saying a word. It wouldn't matter either way. They were all convinced. Mulciber elbowed Nott and smirked as he whispered just loud enough for Severus to hear.

"Probably that ginge Mudblood whore he used to hang around." Severus swallowed thickly, a fiery rage welling up inside him. How dare they speak of Lily that way?! He didn't say anything, though. He wanted them to just drop it.

_Like Hell they will…_

Mulciber chuckled quietly and nodded, watching Severus with a calculating stare. "I'd fuck her."

Severus raised his head so quickly, he nearly developed whiplash. Mulciber's smirk grew wider as he realized that bothered Severus. He shrugged, acting nonchalant about it.

"Really?," Malfoy questioned, a look of obvious disgust on his face, "She's a mudblood. Besides, I heard she was fucking that idiot Potter." Mulciber nodded slowly and wet his lips.

"Yeah. She's got a nice body and a pretty mouth. Ooh… I'd love to fuck her mouth." Severus stood up, his black eyes sparking dangerously. He growled quietly, his voice low and filled with a barely suppressed anger,

"You will _not_ speak of my girlfriend that way." Mulciber laughed loudly along with a few others who sat nearby.

"Girlfriend? Oh, c'mon, mate." He rolled his eyes. "And for your information, I'll say whatever I want to say about your little _whore_."

"I'm warning you." Severus whispered. His muscles tensed, ready and willing to punch Mulciber. He had his wand, of course, but, at the moment, nothing sounded better than to feel Mulciber's bones cracking under his fist. Mulciber, being the complete idiot he was, shrugged again.

"I'll bet she's good and tight, and wet… Yeah, and she's probably a screamer. I like it when they scream. I'd make her go down on me firs- FUCK!" Mulciber toppled backwards as Severus' fist connected with his nose, effectively breaking it. He heard a gasp behind him and someone grabbed his arm. He tried to wrench himself out of the person's grip, wanting to hit Mulciber again. Wanting so badly to fuck him up so badly he wouldn't dare say a word against Lily again.

"Stop!" Dumbledore shouted from his place at the teacher's table. His robes swished about his feet as he walked hurriedly to the source of the fighting. His hand, which was unusually strong for an old man, grabbed onto Severus' shoulder and forced him to stop. "My office! Now, Mr. Snape!" Severus grumbled under his breath and turned his head to see where Lily was. He was surprised to see her standing right beside him. As she slipped her small hand in his, he calmed enough to give Dumbledore a curt nod as he and Lily began making their way out of the Great Hall. He heard Dumbledore tell Mulciber to go to Madame Pomfrey before they were out of the Great Hall.

"Sev, what happened?" Lily watched him, her eyes filled with worry and concern. He couldn't lie to her. Not now. Not ever.

"Those idiots were speaking about you in a-… vulgar way." She blushed and looked down, walking a bit closer to him, than she was before. His arm wrapped around her waist protectively, and his hand rested lightly on her stomach. He wanted to comfort her.

"Thanks for standing up for me... And I guess we can talk to Dumbledore now, yeah?" Severus sighed and nodded. They climbed the stairs to Dumbledore's office quietly, and as Severus reached the tall mahogany door to the Headmaster's office, he sighed. Lily ended up knocking.

"Enter." Dumbledore sounded neither angry, nor happy. Severus slowly opened the door and pulled Lily in behind him. The Headmaster frowned. "Only Mr. Snape, if you don't mind, Mrs. Evans." Lily looked at the ground and shook her head.

"Actually, sir, we needed to speak with you. Together." Dumbledore raised an eyebrow at them, but nodded slowly and offered them a chair. They both sat down, but Lily still held Severus' hand.

"Well, first, before you say what you need to, I must say, Severus: you know fighting is not permitted at Hogwarts. That little incident will cost Slytherin House twenty points." Severus nodded quietly. He looked over at Lily and their eyes met for a second before he spoke.

"Sir, Lily's pregnant." Dumbledore's eyes widened at the suddenness of it, and he leaned forward a little.

"What was that?"

"I'm pregnant," Lily whispered, her cheeks flushed in embarrassment. Dumbledore let out a slow breath and nodded.

"Alright. I'm assuming Mr. Snape is the father, then?" Severus nodded.

_I hope I am, at least._

"Sir," Lily looked up at Dumbledore, her eyes begging him as she spoke, "we want our baby safe. Since Severus is in Slytherin and I'm in Gryffindor… Well, you know." Dumbledore nodded again hesitantly. "We were just wondering-… If there was any way Severus and I could stay somewhere together and- and safe." The Headmaster sat back a moment and thought. He looked at Severus, the wise old eyes considering the scrawny youth quietly.

"Why did you hit Mr. Mulciber, Mr. Snape?" Severus stayed quiet for a moment, only speaking after Lily squeezed his hand reassuringly.

"He was insulting Lily, sir." Dumbledore nodded and sighed, rubbing his temples tiredly.

"Alright. Alright, what about this? Severus, I can place you in Gryffindor Tower. But you must dorm with the boys." Severus' eyes widened and he looked at Lily. She bit her lip and nodded once.

_Fuck. _

"Fine."

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><p><strong>So Sev's a Gryffindor? How do you like that? :P<strong>

**Reviews make me happy! :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello! Love you all, and just to let you know: the POV changes at each line break.**

**Start off with Lily's POV. :)**

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><p>Severus tried very hard to act content with this. But he wasn't. Lily could see it, even though he tried very hard to hide his true feelings from her. He had hurriedly packed up his things from his Slytherin dorm and, as they walked towards Gryffindor tower, Lily could feel the tension in him. She gave his hand a squeeze and he squeezed hers in return. They didn't speak.<p>

After the considerable walk from the dungeons up to Gryffindor tower, she could see the exhaustion that was taking a toll on him. She was sure he hadn't gotten much sleep last night. To be perfectly honest, she hadn't either. She was too busy worrying.

_A baby. I'm going to have a baby._

Her hand instinctively moved to her stomach, her thumb rubbing it gently. Yes, it was scary. Yes, her parents would kill her. Oh, Merlin, that was going to be an awkward conversation.

_"Uh, yeah, so Dad? I lost my virginity this year –and- I'm pregnant. Oh yeah, and you know Severus? That boy you don't approve of me hanging around with? Yeah, he's the father."_

She looked up at Sev and she smiled slightly to herself. She really did love him. Seeing how loyal and protective he was of her made her happy. She felt his thumb rub soothingly over her knuckles and he dropped her hand to wrap his arm around her waist tenderly. Oh how she loved when he did that. Making love to Sev was-… Indescribable. He was so eager to please her, something she marveled at. She didn't even think he particularly cared about himself last night. It was all about her, and the spoiled princess inside of her relished the knowledge that he completely adored her. Aside from his personality, his physical features weren't bad at all. She couldn't quite understand why people said he was so ugly. To her, he was handsome. Light muscling covered his arms, making him attractive in an odd sort of way. His ribs poked out a little, but she planned on making him eat more now that he would be sitting with her at meals. She would bulk him up a little. He had enviable washboard abs, perhaps only visible because he was so skinny. Oh, and he had that "V" muscle, whatever it was called she didn't care, and the sight of it turned her on. Godric, she loved that particular muscle.

Severus snapped her out of her thoughts when he let out a sigh of acceptance, the Fat Lady watching them curiously.

"Love? What's the password?"

Lily blushed a little as she was snapped out of her reverie. "Uh, Blueberry Scone."

The painting swung open, and Sev raised an eyebrow at her. "Blueberry Scone? Really?" He chuckled and she nodded, smiling up at him.

"Yeah, I guess it's sort of silly." He nodded, but he wasn't thinking about it anymore. As Lily stepped inside, Severus was right behind her and she knew he was scanning the Common Room for the Marauders. Thankfully, they weren't there.

"Alright, so I guess I'll see you in the morning?" He asked anxiously, wringing his hands nervously. This was making him uncomfortable, she knew.

She bit her lip and shook her head, her voice soft. "Actually, I- I was sort of hoping I could sleep in your bed tonight." She heard him breathe a sigh of relief and she smiled.

"Yes, that would be lovely." He hugged her for a moment before she led the way up to the boy's dormitories. They reached his room without trouble. Lily knocked a few times on the door and waited. Suddenly, the door swung open and a wet, half naked James Potter smirked.

"Oh, fuck…" she heard Sev mumble under his breath. She quite agreed with him. How predictable. Merlin, they had rotten luck.

"Have you come back to me, Evans? Oh, I knew you would." Lily scowled and shook her head, clearly unhappy. Severus was surprised he hadn't been noticed yet until, yup…

"Snape?! What the fuck are you doing here?!" That made Severus smile: a sort of twisted, crooked smile. When Lily saw it she could hardly guess what he was thinking.

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><p>"Ah, Potter. Dumb luck. We're rooming together."<p>

"And why the fuck would we be doing that?!" Severus looked at Lily as if asking permission. She gave it and sighed, looking down at her toes in embarrassment.

"Well…" Severus took possession of Lily's waist and pulled her close, smirking at James. "Lily's pregnant and I-"

"SHE'S WHAT?!" Severus chuckled very quietly and tilted his head a little, obviously enjoying this.

"Pregnant. Can't you hear? Anyways, as the father, I'd like to protect my child and-"

"YOU'RE CHILD?!" James looked at Lily and Lily hid her face in Severus' robes, clearly ashamed.

"Yes, my child.," he replied quite calmly, circling both arms around Lily. James looked at a loss for words, his eyes wide. He shook his head and passed them, the towel around his waist dripping water as he mumbled obscenities loudly under his breath. Lily hurried to pull Severus inside and he allowed her to, amused by the looks on Potter's face when he'd told him.

_Well, that was fun._

Lily had thrown herself on the empty bed and groaned quietly. Severus frowned a little, concerned about her, and after he pushed his luggage under his new bed he laid down beside her, looking into her eyes.

"What's up?" She let out a little groan and buried her face in the pillow.

"That was –embarrassing-." He pulled her into his arms and frowned a bit more.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he placed a light kiss to her neck. She shivered and let out a tiny whimper.

"I-It's alright. We have to tell people eventually." Severus nodded and Lily sighed, her voice soft. "We'll be ok, right?"

"Right," he said immediately. He didn't want her to worry, despite his own worry over finances. He wasn't exactly rich. For now, to stop the worry, he smiled widely and suddenly he was straddling her, pinning her down.

"Gotcha."

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><p>She loved when he got like this. When he didn't want her to think about something, or he wanted to change the conversation he would do this. He'd acquire this adorably playful glint in his eyes, and he'd start a game with her, his lips curving upwards into a smirk. She loved his lips, the top one thin and the bottom one fuller and more sensuous looking. They made him look sensitive. As for his nose, she knew it was only crooked and a little hooked because of the sheer number of times it had been broken by Tobias over the years. She thought it gave him character. His eyes were fathomless. She felt like she could lose herself in them; simply drift into the darkness, the black. If eyes were the windows to the soul, his soul was like a warm summer night. For her, they were always soft and warm, though she knew when he looked at the Marauders, they were more like black ice. Severus held her firmly against the bed, his legs not permitting hers to move or kick about, one hand gathering both wrists and holding them above her head. To anyone else, it would've looked sexual, but she knew he was only toying with her. She giggled and squirmed in his grip, her eyes bright.<p>

"Sev! You're heavy for someone who looks so skinny!" He raised an eyebrow at her and chuckled.

"You can't get away from me, little lioness? C'mon, where's that fighting Gryffindor spirit?" She struggled a bit harder against him and he laughed when she couldn't get away. She felt his grip on her wrists loosening and she knew he was just about to let go of her when, all of a sudden, a bluish light hit his side and he was knocked off of the bed and onto the floor with an "Oof!"

"Get the fuck off of her, Snivellus!" Lily sat up and looked in the direction of the attacker.

"Potter!," she screamed, her entire being filled with fury, "What the hell!?"

"He was going to rape you, Lily! I saw!" She huffed and shook her head.

"No, he wasn't! We were just playing and- Oh my God, SEV!" She had turned to check on Severus. He was writhing on the floor, grasping at his throat. His skin was turning blue and his mouth was opening and closing like a fish out of the water. Lily screamed and immediately rushed to his side, her eyes wide and panicky.

Sev couldn't breathe.

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><p><strong>Ah, we all knew this would happen, didn't we? <strong>

**Please review! I'll upload the next Chapter quicker.**

**Otherwise, I may be forced to work on my other stories and leave you all hanging... Mwahaha! *evil laugh***


	9. Chapter 9

"Sev! Sev, love, look at me!" Lily knelt down beside him, pulling his head into her lap as his face turned a horrible shade of purple. His legs thrashed about, his fingers clawing at his neck as if he thought someone was choking him. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked at him, then back to Potter.

"JAMES! Stop!" James merely growled, his eyes trained on Severus with the purest hatred in them. He was frightening to look at, fierce and irrational.

"He's a danger to you, Lily," came his quiet reply. "It's better this way."

Her eyes widened. "YOU'LL KILL HIM!" James nodded, watching as Severus' struggles weakened and his body shuddered. Lily leaned down and kissed Sev's cheek as she sobbed quietly.

"James, please…"

James' faltered, his wand waving a bit and he watched as Severus, with his last moments of consciousness, look up at Lily. He watched as Severus finally went limp and heard Lily scream. He watched, and finally stopped the spell. Lily was in hysterics. Tears dripped onto Sev's unconscious face. The normal paleness of his skin returned as his body was finally allowed oxygen. As Severus slowly woke, Lily kissed his cheeks, his nose, his lips; anywhere she could reach. She held onto him for dear life but, by the time she remembered who was to blame for this, James had disappeared.

"L-Lily…?" Sev whispered hoarsely. Lily nodded and kissed his forehead, forgetting about James for a moment.

"Yes, my love." Sev nodded and groaned, reaching a hand up to rub his head.

"That fucking bastard," he mumbled, "He was going to kill me." Lily nodded, a little shaken by the whole experience and she helped him up slowly into a sitting position.

"Are you ok?" she whispered. He simply nodded and rubbed his temples like he did when he had a headache. "That scared me."

He looked at her a moment, nodding slowly. "Me too." Lily looked up at him, seeing the fear in his eyes that she knew matched her own and suddenly their lips crashed together and they were kissing. It was a wild, needy, desperate kiss that whirled Lily into a state of bliss and hunger. She _needed_ to feel him; _needed_ to know he was all there and alright. His arms encircled her and pulled her body firmly to his, her breath becoming heavier and hot as his tongue slid sneakily into her mouth. She groaned against him and he growled softly, lifting her up and off her feet. Her legs wrapped around his waist as he carried her to the door. With her back pressed against the hard, smooth wood she heard the click of the lock as he ensured that they would not be interrupted. They both needed this.

It wasn't long before they were on the bed, their hands greedy and eager for one another. This was so different from last night. This was all heat, fire, and need compared to the gentle slowness of their first try. She loved it. The tiny spark of adventure fueled her Gryffindorian needs, making her want him even more. She was positively amazed at how well he'd paid attention to her last night. He knew exactly how to touch her, exactly how to kiss her, and as his warm wet lips met her pulse point she swore softly under her breath. She heard him give a breathless chuckle.

"That dirty mouth is quite… sexy." He drew the last word into a whisper, his tongue flicking out to taste her goose bumped skin. Merlin, he was good at this.

"Sev…" she whined, her eyes squeezed shut as she panted underneath him. Her hand slipped under the hem of his loosened pants and she felt his entire body stiffen when her fingers slid over his hardening length. His hands fumbled at her skirt, still a little awkward and hasty, but she loved it all the same, knowing he couldn't be perfect at everything the second time. Her shirt was unbuttoned at an equally fast rate and, though it gave him difficulty, the bra soon followed. A low rumble of approval emitted from his throat when he saw her breasts, his lips eagerly nuzzling downwards until they reached them and latched on. She moaned as she felt his warm tongue lap at a nipple, her fingers entangling themselves in his hair as if she had to hold on for dear life.

She was quickly becoming very uncomfortable in her dampening knickers, the fabric nearly soaked through and dripping. How did he have this effect on her? As always with Sev, he seemed able to read her mind and within seconds the knickers were around her ankles. She kicked them off with slight annoyance as she worked his trousers and underwear down as well. She smiled at the sight of him.

_This feels so right…_

He pulled her up further onto the bed, setting her down gently so she could rest her head on the pillow. She smiled as his lips returned to hers, anxious to feel him fill her. Her legs wrapped around his hips instinctively as she felt him line up with her entrance. The moment she thought he was finally going to plunge so deliciously into her, he stopped. Those warm chocolate brown eyes melted her green ones as he looked at her and gave that same little shy and slightly nervous smile he did last night. She felt their noses rub together as he whispered,

"I-Is this ok?" He swallowed and pecked her lips. "Are y-you ready, love?" Her heart filled with adoration for him. James never bothered to ask…

"Y-Yes. Of course I am." She gave him a small smile, which he returned.

"I love you."

"I love you too, Sev." She felt his lips on hers again as he very slowly slid into her. He moaned exquisitely against her mouth and she let out a little whimper of pleasure. She loved his little noise and she assumed by the way he was smiling that he loved hers too. How could this be so natural? Wasn't it strange to have this sort of intimacy with your best friend?

_He's not just your best friend anymore. You love him, plus: he's the father of your child._

She let out a drawn out moan as he moved inside her. She loved how steady he was. He was slow at first, thrusting so deeply she gasped with each movement. Gradually, however, his muscles would contract and his hips would rock into her faster, harder. There was unity as she moved up to meet him, and their moans gathered in volume as she felt the wave of pure pleasure rising up in her. All the while, he touched her. His hands brushed lightly over her skin, feeling her as reverently as the first time and she knew that, as long as she lived, she would never tire of it. He adored her, and she could feel it in his every touch.

Her heart fluttered as, much too soon, she tipped over the edge of ecstacy but he wasn't done just yet. As he tried to hurry himself along, his quickened thrusts caused her orgasm to intensify and she cried out.

"Sev!" But that was it. She leaned up and captured his lips as she felt the first hot spurt of his release drip inside of her. His moans muffled against her mouth and she groaned as she allowed herself to drift over the waves of pleasure, panting hard.

She let out another small whimper as she felt him pull out of her. Soon, she was under the duvet, yawning as she snuggled close, amazed by him. He kissed the top of her head and she heard the fast beating of his heart. Slowly, his breathing returned to normal, his heart took its' usual rhythm back up and she was drifting asleep in his arms.

There was nothing to say. So he held her, and she allowed herself to be held, because that meant more than any variation of "I love you."

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><p><strong>Awwww... *tear* <strong>

**Love you all and Please Review for faster chapter updates! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

The following weeks were difficult for Severus and Lily. First of all, apparently Lily's mother had gotten horrible morning sickness with both of her daughters. Unfortunately, this gene was passed along to poor Lily. It had been merely five weeks since that first night when Lily had conceived their child and already she was constantly sick. They had both missed several classes, Lily was simply too sick to go and Severus was unwilling to leave her side as she consistently emptied her stomach contents.

After about a week of no classes attended, Severus had reluctantly gone to some of their classes and they often did their classwork together, keeping up with their essays and homework to avoid arousing suspicion. Oddly, though people gossiped about the Slytherin staying in Gryffindor tower and the girl who slept with him every night, there was no hint of a pregnancy rumor. James, ashamed that he'd lost "his girl" to a Slytherin, hadn't told a soul. Severus doubted he'd even told Sirius.

But Lily was growing, and Severus knew that soon they wouldn't be able to hide it. Luckily, Summer break was almost upon them. They just needed to get through their OWLs. They hadn't told Lily's parents about the baby yet, only that they were dating. Lily frequently panicked over it, and though Severus did his best to calm her, he was secretly scared out of his mind.

_What if her Dad keeps me from seeing her? What if they make her give up our baby? What if Mr. Evans cuts my penis off?_

He wasn't even joking with that last one. It was a possibility.

He'd also been extremely careful to avoid his former housemates. He kept Lily far away from the dungeons, practically growling at them if they dared pass him and Lily in the hallways, one arm automatically wrapped around her waist. He was like her guard dog. He knew he frightened some of them.

He hadn't stopped going to the meetings, but his attendance was becoming few and far between. He knew the Dark Lord didn't particularly care about him anyways because he was a half blood. His desire to become that great and powerful wizard that Lily would respect was gone. Being faithful had worked like a charm on her.

Honestly, he didn't know how girls made it through pregnancy alone. He'd seen several students at Hogwarts sporting swollen baby bellies, but hardly ever had he seen one with a guy supporting her. He supposed they were scared, which he understood. Hell, he was terrified…

"Sev…?"

He was pulled out of musings at that one little word, pulling Lily to his body as she opened her bloodshot and swollen eyes to look at him. He pressed a small kiss to her forehead. She'd been sick all morning but luckily it was a Saturday. No classes and plus, it was raining. Lily loved the rain and secretly so did Severus. It meant more time in bed with her.

"Yes, my love?" he whispered back softly, breathing in that flowery scent of hers that calmed him so well.

"Our baby… What do you want? A boy or girl?" she whispered with a tiny smile curled on her lips. He returned her grin, nuzzling her cheek with his lips as the rain came down in torrents.

"Hmm…. I don't know. What do you want?" She shrugged slightly in reply, letting out a raspy cough. He wished he could stop her horrible morning sickness.

"I want a healthy baby." She whispered softly. He nodded as he pressed a tiny kiss to her cheek. His fingers explored her baby bump as he thought.

"Yes, so do I. Though, I did always think I'd have a girl first..."

She nodded again and nuzzled her head into the crook of his neck, her eyes fluttering closed again.

"We'll have to start making appointments to the Healers…" she yawned, "or to a Muggle doctor. We can find out if we're having a little girl or boy soon, I bet." He smiled softly, his thumb lightly caressing her belly button which must've tickled because she giggled and pressed a kiss to his neck.

"Hey. Quit that. It tickles." He chuckled and stopped the motion.

"Sorry." She kissed his neck again and he shivered at the contact. Merlin, not now. She was sick.

He swallowed the lustful feelings inside his body. She had such an effect on him, it was difficult to keep from being excited by her soft lips. She yawned and he could feel her as her body began to drift off to sleep. Finally. Neither one of them had gotten much sleep since around five that morning. They'd been up and down at the toilet nearly every fifteen minutes.

"Love you, Sev…" she whispered as she fell asleep.

"I love you too. Now, sleep, my darling…" she nodded against his skin and he smiled. As he pressed his lips to her cheek one more he closed his eyes.

Never again could he go to a Death Eater meeting. It was unsafe and he would protect Lily and his baby even if his life was at stake. Based on when Lily had conceived, their child should be born in early August. He didn't know what they'd do next year when they needed to return to Hogwarts for their final year…

He felt Lily shiver beside him and he pulled the comforter up closer, right up to her chin. He kissed her forehead softly. This would work. He could take care of his family.

"James is wrong about you." Severus turned his head as he searched the room, his eyes wide as he pulled his wand from his pocket.

"Who's there?" He ordered as his arms tightened around his sleeping Lily. A slumped figure stepped quietly into the room. His tawny colored hair and skin adorned with jagged scars gave him away. Remus.

Remus took a small shy step forward and watched Lily for a moment, a small smile on his lips. "You're good to her. You take care of her like she deserves." Severus' eyes softened for a moment, sensing no threat in Remus. After all, Remus had never been one to attack him. He was simply in the background, shaking his head in disapproval. Severus didn't know what to say. He'd never spoken to the boy before. So, he simply gave him a small nod which Remus returned before he exited the room, leaving the couple their privacy. Severus relaxed considerably as he left, closing the curtains around them.

The rain outside was worsening, but he didn't mind. It was lulling him to sleep. He yawned, cuddling into Lily more.

But a big brown eagle owl barreling into him managed to wake both of them up.

He groaned, sitting up as Lily yawned, her eyes a bit wide.

"Sev? Who's the owl here for?" Severus tiredly took the small note from the owl, glad that the enormous bird immediately flew back out of the room. He sighed when he read over the note, handing it to her for her to see.

"But-… Why?"

"I don't know."

Dumbledore had requested their presence. Immediately.

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><p><strong>Review please! Love you guys :)<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

Thankfully, by the time they'd received the owl, everyone had gone back to their dorms. The lazy Saturday practically begged to be filled with naps and lounging as there was no way any of the Quidditch teams were going to practice in the deluge. So, for the couple walking at a slow and steady pace down the long corridors and up the tiring stairs of Hogwarts, there were no interruptions. The pounding rain echoed off of the walls, giving the walk an eerie feel to it. Shadows and flame flickered about the stone, and Lily shifted closer as they made their way towards their destination. Severus noticed that Lily's breathing had been a bit more labored as they finally reached the stairs to the Headmaster's quarters. She smiled reassuringly up at him as he turned and waited, taking her small hand in his as he began to help her up the stairs.

"So… many… bloody… stairs…" She panted. Her palm rested protectively over her slight baby bump. Severus nodded sympathetically, his hand moving to the small of her back in order to help support her.

"Sorry, Lils. Feet hurt?"

She nodded and looked up at him with a grimace. "Apparently, my mother had the most overactive pregnancy symptoms that ever were. I feel sorry for you when the mood swings set in."

He grimaced as if he was scared and she giggled at his expression. "I think if I've put up with you for this long, I can handle anything." She tried to look appalled, her eyes wide and mouth gaping, but ended up laughing instead, the action causing her to gasp for breath. Severus stopped their ascent to allow her to catch her breath and she leaned against him slightly. He rubbed her back gently and smiled at her as he whispered, "I'll give you a nice foot rub when we get back to my room. Sounds good, yeah?" He leaned over and kissed her cheek and he felt her smile.

"Yeah… That sounds perfect."

"Mmm…" he mumbled against her head. "Ready to see why climbing all these bloody stairs is so necessary?" She nodded and he coaxed her to resume walking again, albeit at a slower pace than before. He didn't want to tire her further. As they reached the Headmaster's office, Severus was surprised to see the door open and Dumbledore seated at his desk as if waiting for them. His old wrinkled hands were folded on the desk and he smiled the sort of smile that made Severus sick with worry. He could sense immediately that the Headmaster wanted something desperately.

"Lily. Severus." The frightening smile grew. "Thank you for coming."

"What's this about?" Severus demanded and he felt Lily elbow him in the ribs. He didn't care if he was being rude. Something about this just didn't seem right. But Dumbledore simply chuckled and raised an eyebrow.

"What makes you think something's wrong?" Severus' hold on Lily tightened but he didn't answer. Dumbledore didn't seem the slightest worried about hurrying the process along, however and he leaned backwards in his chair, gesturing towards the large leather seats.

"Have a seat. I'm sure Ms. Evans would like a rest after that considerable climb." He turned to Lily and she smiled back at him kindly. "I do apologize."

"No, that's quite alright, Sir." She replied in her polite tone, her arms wrapped protectively around her belly as she sat with little difficulty. Severus chose the black leather seat beside her and stared hard at Dumbledore.

_What's he after…?_

For a long uncomfortable time, Dumbledore did not speak. He shifted papers around as his scraggly Phoenix squawked weakly at them. Severus wondered if maybe the old man had finally gone mad. He reached across the small space between his chair and Lily's and took her hand gently. Finally, Dumbledore looked up.

"Severus, I understand you recently have stopped allowing yourself into the company of your old Slytherin dorm mates. Why?"

Severus looked stunned. This was not what he had been expecting at all. Of course, he didn't know what quite he did expect. Certainly not questions of his social life. Lily threw him a nervous glance, but he hardly noticed.

"I-… I've been caring for Lily. Why?" It wasn't a complete lie…

Dumbledore took in a large breath and let it out very slowly, his gaze focused steadily on Severus. He leaned a little closer across his desk and seemed a bit hesitant to go on.

"I know of their reputation, Severus. I know of their training." Severus' eyes widened and he dropped Lily's hand a moment. He didn't want her to feel him tremble.

"Sir, I do not wish to endanger my baby nor Lily by being near them or participating in their… activities…" He answered quite softly, wringing his hands.

"Sev…" he heard Lily whisper in concern and he looked up. She gave him a gentle look and smiled softly, and he turned back to Dumbledore.

"Severus, I need a favor." The Headmaster spoke very quietly, almost as if he felt shame for what he was about to ask. Severus' stomach clenched. There was no way this was going to be good.

"Sir?"

"Severus, I need a very special person. This person could change the war, could end it. This person could keep thousands of needless murders from happening." Severus said nothing, and Dumbledore continued, "I need a spy, Severus."

Severus swallowed, whispering. "So?"

"I want you to be my spy."

Lily flinched. Severus couldn't move, he couldn't speak. He could feel his body slowly filling with a blind fury. How could Dumbledore ask for something so large?! How could he ask for Severus to put Lily and his child into such mortal danger!? All for a stupid war?! Quite frankly, Severus didn't give a rat's arse for the war as long as Lily and the baby was safe!

"No, absolutely not!" He said firmly, standing and glaring over his nose at Dumbledore. "My family would be in considerable danger!_ I_ would be in danger!"

"I know the risks are great, but-…"

"But nothing! My answer is no!" Lily stood as well and took his hand, squeezing it gently. He looked over at her, his eyes and muscles relaxing a little. Dumbledore raised an eyebrow.

"I can offer my personal protection over Lily and the child as well as a wage for your services. It will be more than enough to care for your family." Severus tensed and stared at Dumbledore. He didn't know what to say. That was all he wanted. This would be a way to care for Lily, to protect her. He swallowed thickly and looked at Lily. He was surprised to see the tears in her eyes and she shook her head very slightly.

Of course Lily didn't want him to do it. He didn't want to do it. But the prospect of being able to both physically and financially care for Lily and the baby was beyond tempting. He knew it would be dangerous. He'd have to restart his attendance to those horrible meetings. He'd have to be Marked, and Crucio'd. He may have to rape, to torture, to kill. He hated those things. What would Lily think of him when he came home at night and told her of all the things they made him do? He had horrible secrets already and he wasn't even a member! But, still... Providing for her and protecting them both is a valuable wage. He didn't know. He couldn't make a decision right now. He needed to talk to Lily first.

"You can ensure their complete safety?" Severus whispered quietly, his head bowed so that he didn't have to look Lily in the eyes. He knew this was upsetting her.

"Yes." Dumbledore replied firmly, smiling slightly as if he was already expecting an agreement.

Severus looked over at Lily. He saw the tears in her eyes and he watched her bottom lip tremble. He could see how protectively she held her belly, their little ball of life twitching about somewhere safe and warm inside her. He squeezed her small cool hand and drew her closer. As she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face into his chest he kissed the top of her head and looked up at Dumbledore.

"I'll think about it." Lily shivered and tightened her grip on him. Dumbledore looked happy and nodded.

"That's all I ask."

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><p><strong>OOH... Will he do it?<strong>

**Review for a quicker chapter update. Love you all. :) 3**


	12. Chapter 12

**I know I haven't posted in a while and I'm sorry! Everything with my first year at University and whatnot have kept me incredibly busy! I'll start trying to update more often!**

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><p>He couldn't help but feel guilty for the wetness that left little dark patches against his shoulders. It was all his fault after all. If only she would stop crying…<p>

"Please…" There it was again. That shaky prayer of a whisper that nearly killed him with each utterance. His arms tighten around her and he manages to press a kiss to her forehead. He hardly spoke.

"Sev, please." Lily whispers again, forcing him to look into her tear-filled eyes as she spoke. He swallows the lump in his throat and tried to tear his gaze away as he shifted the blankets more comfortably around them.

"Severus Snape, don't you dare ignore me." She chokes out in desperation, her eyebrows furrowed.

He sighs, closing his own eyes. "Lily, what can I do?"

"You can listen to me!" She pleads, "You can get it through your thick skull that this is dangerous!"

"Don't you see?!" He finally snaps. "This has all happened very quickly for me! Last month, you hated my guts! Then suddenly, we're in bed together and then you're pregnant and now I can take care of both of you by doing this!"

"Are you complaining that we got together in the first place?" Lily growls, moving herself out of his grip as she glares at him.

"Not at all!," he defends, "You just have to understand that this may be my only solution! I swore to protect you! To care for my family! I don't have many other options!"

"Options?! You're absolutely brilliant! How can you say you don't have options?"

"With my family, my background, my general appearance? No way anyone would hire me!"

"You're being ridiculous! Of course you'll be hired!"

Severus makes a noise of annoyance. "Oh yeah? And when will that happen? After our baby is born? After we're in debt and living in the streets?"

Lily goes quiet for a moment, her head dipping a little. Only then does Severus notice she's shaking. He immediately calms himself, his eyes softening as he recognizes the pain in her features. But there really was no way of comforting her. He had to do this. It was simply the only option.

"Lily…" He sighs softly, but she flinches away from his hands.

"Don't." she warns quietly.

"Lily, dear…" he edges a little closer. "Please don't cry. It needs to be done. You know that. For our baby, hm? For our little one."

She doesn't say anything, staring down at the little lump of a belly that now defined their lives so much. She places her hand against it and runs her thumb against it, sniffling softly. When Severus moves closer, she does not object, and he wraps himself around her.

"I'll be careful," he whispers, "I know how they work. I know how they're organized. I know when to keep my head low and stay out of the way."

"B-But what if…" she whimpers, "what if you're caught? What if he figures it out? You'll be killed."

Severus stays quiet for a moment, stamping the fear that had risen back down at that thought. Instead he attempts to stay light hearted. "I'd never leave you. You know that. And I'd certainly never leave our little peanut without a Daddy." He gives her a tiny smile.

"There's no convincing you, I suppose?" Lily whispers quietly, her nose tucked into his neck. His scent calmed her far better than his words.

After several long seconds he shakes his head and mumbles, "No, I'm afraid there isn't."

"Then let's go to sleep." She grumbles, and Severus could hear the irritation in her voice. He sighs, but lays down, curling his body around her in a protective manner. Although she didn't speak any more, for several hours he stroked his fingers soothingly over the softness of her skin. He whispered words of love and devotion into the back of her neck, each between kisses. He held her protectively, and when he finally did sleep, he did so with one palm resting comfortably against their baby. He wasn't going to leave her. He'd promised her that when they'd first found out she was pregnant. If Severus Snape was anything, he was loyal to his dying breath.

In the morning, just as the light was peeking above the mountains all rosy and cheerful, Dumbledore watched an owl flying towards him. Carefully peeling off the note, there were only two simple words etched there.

_For Lily._


End file.
